Susan V. Lacerra is an awakened former investment banker living in San Francisco. -AK
This week, I’m back to MY THEME SONG from a few weeks ago, BUDAPEST by George Ezra, and this awesome line,
“give me one good reason why I should never make a change.”
One day a DREAM gave me a darn good reason to want to change
For years I fondly held the memory of my childhood dreams.
Growing up, how I wished the world was different. But in my dreams, there existed a place where people lived peacefully and took care of each other, had a true democracy and used advanced technologies. Yes I loved Star Trek! My dreams had other planets in them and I traveled between the stars.
And I didn’t think those dreams were going to come true.
But I still wanted to change the world.
Well, as my life developed, other dreams took precedence.
I went into money trading and then investment banking after college, and I did assist in completing many financial transactions on teams that raised billions of dollars for the companies we worked with, completing 23 transactions in a short number of years. These deals helped bring in tens of millions in revenues for the investment banks I worked for. I loved traveling, was promoted, and generally “did well”. I was proud of my accomplishments and satisfied with my competence.
One night, after almost a decade and a half in finance, and after making my key career goals, I had a dream that basically ROCKED MY world, and, not in a good way. The dream rocked my world in a “what the heck!!!???” kind of way.
In my DREAM, I was standing in the middle of a VAST STADIUM.
I was on the center line on the green, and a man in, yes, white robes, was standing to my right, and we were looking up into the stands, and he was pointing, and explaining things about LIFE to me.
He said EACH PERSON had a STADIUM.
What he explained was that each person’s STADIUM contained all the people that they had effected in a positive way during their lifetime on EARTH.
Here’s the thing about the STADIUM –
This benefit was THROUGH THE HEART out to OTHERS.
EGO need not apply; actions with a seemingly positive effect, if they were motivated by surreptitious intentions, DID NOT COUNT.
He explained that when we DIE, that this was ALL WE TOOK WITH US, ALL THAT HAD ANY MEANING – it was the people we had effected, influenced, helped, and benefitted in some way.
OUR LEGACY AS HUMAN BEINGS
AND THIS WAS OUR LEGACY. Because for EACH PERSON that we benefit, the benefit, the good, the influence, flowed through to their succeeding generations, and so on, and so on.
AND, ALL OF THESE PEOPLE WOULD BE IN YOUR STADIUM. So that, even though our lives on earth can be short, our EFFECT on our FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS can be extraordinary.
AND, the man explained, THERE WERE PEOPLE WHOSE STADIUMS WERE FILLED TO THE BRIM, WERE FILLED TO OVERFLOWING.
As he spoke, I saw that possibility, and the thrill of the person who had such a stadium standing right where I was, looking up at the packed stadium, seeing them cheering, and the thrill and the joy of such a successful Earth lifetime.
I grew excited to see mine. I was hopeful about what it was like. With all the activity I had manifested, all my successes, I was sure it would be a good one.
Now, he explained, he would show me my stadium containing all of the people that I had positively affected up to that point in my life, and the succeeding generations this benefit had passed through to….
As I looked up, the shock was almost too much to bear. Where were all the people?
There were, like, SIX people in the STADIUM.
The rest of the seats were vacant, EMPTY.
The shock waves resonated through my body and I immediately woke with a feeling that is indescribable, that feels nauseating, like utter dismay, like crushed dreams, like a heart attack about to happen.
Because, a part of me knew, knew that this was true.
I had the real sense that, despite all my worldly “accomplishments”, it seemed that my Soul felt that it had utterly failed up to that time through my life.
Clearly, rather than saving the world, I had to save myself.
LOVE FILLS OUR STADIUMS.
In the years since my Stadium dream, I searched for how to do my work in the world in a way that would be profitable and fulfill the message of my dream.
My conclusion was that I would follow the guidance of my Soul.
I gave her the driver’s seat.
BECAUSE I GET IT.
What is Sustainable Leadership? Spiritual Leadership? Authentic Leadership? Business Leadership?
I GET THAT EVERYDAY, ALL THAT MATTERS, in my life, in my day-to-day work, IS MY INTENTION as I’m working FOR MYSELF and WITH OTHERS.
That is what this kind of LEADERSHIP is about.
It’s about where you are really coming from.
No matter what you do in your life. No matter what your work is.
We are all on the green in the stadium of our lives, looking up at the stands.
HOW WILL YOU influence people for the better?
CAN YOU HEAR THE CROWD, STOMPING? CHEERING?
Now that’s a dream with a happy ending.
© 2015 Susan V. Lacerra, Inspired Strategies, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Re-blogged with permission of Susan V. Lacerra by American Kabuki